I am pretty upset with myself for not standing up for myself at an audition today. Things were already a little strange when I started filling out my details on the form I was given. I had not filled in my home phone number and but was asked if I had one. I mentioned that I did but that it would be best to contact me on my cellphone. Nonetheless, the guy insisted that I gave my number anyway and so, not wanting to be difficult, I gave it to him. The other thing that bothered me was having to put my age down on paper. I know for a fact that in the US, it's wrong to ask for an actor's age. They should cast purely based on what they see. I told myself, this was Singapore and things weren't going to change for a long time more. Anyway, it was all petty stuff.

Then the real deal came. I had on minimal make-up like I normally have on for any TV or film audition. I'm also rather fair so the slight bronzer I had applied onto my face was just to make me look like I hadn't just seen a ghost. I walked into the studio and even thought to myself, "Thank goodness I have SOME make-up. These lights are awfully bright". But because they were so bright and because I had just applied some lip balm, the casting director caught a glint of it and asked if I had make-up on. I said I had some. Then, she told me that this was TV and not stage and asked me to remove it with a wet wipe. I took some facial tissue and wiped it across my face and also took out the lip balm but she still insisted I use a wet wipe.

So I used one and it left my face a little shiny. By this time, the mosquito bite that I had from the morning was glowing bright red without any concealer left over it. She also asked me to restyle my hair for her. I did everything she requested for feeling rather raped and quite ugly by the end of it. How was I supposed to get the job now anyway? "Now your face is too shiny, can you blot it with this?", she quipped and offered me slightly powdered facial blotters. That's why I HAD some make-up on in the first place you dope! To keep it matt! I couldn't help but wonder why she had a stash of wet wipes and facial blotters in her studio in any case. I might as well have auditioned for Rudolph the Red Mosquito Bitten Snowman because there was no way I looked like a music student by the end of it.

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